The Positive Discipline Parenting Tool we explored this past week was Special Time! Special Time is quality time that you reserve to spend with another person. This time is very important for maintaining personal relationships.
Many parents schedule date nights, an evening away from the kids just for them. This time set aside for being "alone"together is a valuable part of any adult relationship. Just as date night nurtures a marriage special time is an essential part of a parent child relationship. The Parenting Tool card says that children ages 2-6 need 10 minutes per day and children 7-12 need 30 minutes per week, and after age twelve to try to schedule something once a month that they can't resist. As you can see this isn't an unmanageable commitment. I am pretty sure most parents could commit 10 minutes a day to their little ones.
When I first thought about this tool, I honestly thought to myself "I don't need this one, I am a stay at home mom with both my kids all day everyday". With this thinking I first approached my husband. I suggested that he arrange a special time for he and our 5 year old daughter each day. He thought that it was a good idea. We also agreed that it would be a good way to let her know that daddy needed to have a little one on one time with our baby boy. Once we approached her with the idea of special time with daddy each day she was thrilled and quickly agreed that she would help me with getting dinner ready so that daddy could have some special time with her brother too!
So far this week their special time went really well, and I can tell that they both look forward to that uninterrupted time together! Now I think I will try to schedule a special time with her at least once each week, where we aren't doing school or chores, just having fun-girl time! I can tell that this Special Time is really very special to all of us. I also think that it helps when there are times that she wants to play with us or do something with us and we want to have some quiet time, knowing she will have her time later makes it easier to take. Yet another simple idea that can mean so much to your child, and can make such a big difference in your relationship, even the adult ones.
On to the next week: Take Time for Training!